No Place for Us (story)
They first met at a free speech promotion meeting, introduced by a friend of a friend who knew a friend of the other. The room was dark and stuffy, cramped with nervous people. They were both there more out of obligation and group pressure rather than mutinous spirit, the two of them being of the more cautiously rebellious kind. They spent most of the time quietly talking in the background. Many years later, Jane could not for the life of her remember what it was they had talked about at their first meeting, but knowing them both it had probably been a string of non-sequiturs and awkward shifts in topic. Granya, a mousy woman with wide chest and short legs but an adorable smile, was there because some friends had dragged her along. Jane was there out of obligation for her mother, Elsie, who was responsible for most of the organisation behind the gathering. Elsie spent most of the meeting holding a very passionate, but long-winded, speech about what was wrong with society, occasionally broken off when opinions went too far apart in the room and arguments ensued. The warning call about the secret police being onto them came just little more than an hour into the meeting proper and abruptly ended all arguments on the spot. Jane’s mom was swept out of the building by sheer momentum of the people around her but once out she stayed behind long enough to see Jane and Granya respectively hobble and half-jog into the back streets, signalling Jane to go on before hurrying off in a different direction. Jane would remember the following hours a slight bit better than the meeting, though mostly because it seemed that being lost together for nearly three hours was an excellent way of making friends. They both talked about shows and books they remembered from before the new regime, Jane being slightly more in favour of the written word while Granya was more interested in visual media like movies, cartoons and comics. Granya talked about the institution where she lived but didn’t mention her diagnoses. Jane mentioned the accident that had landed her the crutches, but didn’t mention how the pain made it more and more difficult to get up every morning and go back to work. In the end, what they really bonded over was the fantastical worlds that seemed so real to Granya, the secret hopes and dreams that somewhere out there was a portal to the fantastical worlds she had dreamt up. Jane found herself so fascinated with the fantasy that in that moment she wished it was true. ... (Jane seeing the institution for the first time) ... Technically it had been Jane’s own fault for getting injured. There were regulations. If she had followed the regulations she would have been fine. Lift with your knees, don’t lift too heavy. She could never give a very good answer to why she had sidestepped the safety regulations when asked. It was the reality of the floor; items had to be moved, pace had to be kept, everyone was behind on their own work. There was never time to think of safety when work was a grey haze of activity. ... After the injury, Jane stopped sleeping on her back. The bedsprings were so worn down that there was a veritable sinkhole in the middle. She took care to sleep at the very edge, curled up on her side as comfortably as she could. One morning Jane woke up and nearly panicked because she had rolled over to her back in her sleep, and lay there in the middle of the sagging bed unable to turn or sit up at all without feeling a stabbing pain at her lower back. She could not remember ever feeling so helpless. ... One day when Jane came to the institution she was told that she’d have to return another day, because a boy had hanged himself. The official story was that he had somehow skipped his medication. Over the next few days the story slowly evolved to propaganda for the importance of minding ones medication and how many patients don’t get enough medication. A month later, all patients at the institution had to be re-evaluated in regards to their medication, something that was greatly applauded in local news media. After the re-evaluation all patients received an increased dose of various medications. And Jane wasn’t stupid. She knew perfectly well that some medication was necessary for some of the diagnosed to function, including Granya, but the additional pill she had to take now only seemed to make her morose. The staff claimed that it was likely trauma kicking in, sorrow over the boy who died. Jane was there often enough to see that these moods always followed the pattern of medication though, and when she mentioned this to her mother Elsie urged her to do what she could to be at the institution when Granya would be at her lowest. Elsie was the only person Jane knew who didn’t even periodically take medication. She didn’t trust them, and would probably try to make her own remedies if she just knew how. Granya had followed in her mother’s footsteps until the injury. After that there really wasn’t a choice any more, she couldn’t move without some kind of painkiller and she would now always wake up not when the alarm rang or when she heard Elsie turn on the radio but when her painkillers wore off in the night and the stabbing, searing pain grabbed hold of her back. ... Many years later, Jane wouldn’t remember why Granya had been crying that day. It had probably been some kind of fight with the staff at the institution, or maybe with some of the other diagnosed (Jane was increasingly hesitant to call them “patients”, patients are people who are treated for something – the diagnosed were just stored in the institution). Maybe it was just the memory of the hanged patient that haunted her. Either way, Granya was crying in the empty front lawn and Jane was there on a visit and she managed to fall down on the bench next to Granya without hurting herself too badly and remembered to prop the crutches against the arm rest upside down so that they wouldn’t fall to the ground. Jane tried to comfort Granya the same way Elsie had comforted Jane when she was small and upset, holding her as tight as she could, humming low when she couldn’t think of anything encouraging to say and stroking her back. The kiss was almost but not quite an accident. It certainly wasn’t something she intended to do. It was an impulse, just a slight shift in movement that brushed her lips against that spot somewhere between Granya’s lips and her cheek. Of course she tried to excuse it immediately afterwards, calling it a friendly kiss. It was okay for friends to kiss, it didn’t mean anything more than that. Years later Jane couldn’t remember why Granya had been crying, or anything of what they did or said after the kiss. But she’d always remember the kiss. ... “''You’ve been cutting yourself!?” “Don’t look at me like that. The ritual demanded blood from the intended host; I couldn’t very well put someone else in that position could I?” There was a brief flicker in her expression, and then Will leaned forward to turn the card over with a brisk snap. “Actually, traditionally it ''would be someone else in that position. The kind of people capable of summoning spirits would usually be the kind of people who could procure slaves from somewhere. People, as a rule of thumb, do not like to be possessed because as you might be noticing, it makes communication a bit difficult. That and the earliest examples of exorcism consisted of killing the host when the spirit became a nuisance.” (Meeting Will and Will trying to explain that magic is not good) ... (Jane and Granya get caught kissing each other at the institution) ... Jane approached the figure that should be, but definitely wasn’t her mother. “Will?” She was met with a wide smile. “Hello there dove, nicely spotted. How did you know it was me?” “Mum always drinks her tea sweet and with milk, no exceptions. You’re drinking it plain and not making faces over it.” “No accounting for taste I suppose, and would there be any way in which I can be of assistance to you?” There was something lascivious or maybe smug about the way Will smiled. Elsie never smiled like that, wide enough to wrinkle the corners of her eyes but with something much sharper beneath that spoke of calculation and, Jane imagined, deceit. “I want you gone from my mum, but there’s not much hope of that happening is there?” “No. She summoned me using her own blood as anchor, and I will, heh, will stay with her for the rest of her life. Now, what did you really want to talk about?” Jane put down her own teacup and wondered if she’d be able to get down in the chair. Possibly, and it would take the strain off her feet, but in the end she decided to pick up the mug again and lean against the sink. She swirled the spoon in idle restlessness. “They’ve imprisoned Granya at the institution. They won’t let her leave and they won’t let me visit. Safety regulations, because I’m not her family. Well, actually, in this case being family would probably be the only thing that could make this any more damning.” Will took a long gulp of tea. “Well, you’re not asking me for help – you are too cautious for that, smart girl. So what are you going to do?” Jane laughed helplessly and dragged her fingers through her hair. It felt greasy and she realised she had forgotten to shower. “Not cautious enough it seems. What can I do? As much as the institution has her trapped she still needs her routines, her medicines... if I were to, I don’t know, just somehow take her away from there, would I be able to care for her? I can barely care for myself!” And, a nagging voice added in the back of her mind, what if you really did take advantage of her? It had felt right at the time, it had felt damn right, but what if she really had manipulated Granya without meaning to? “Is that really so? Well, you think about that and I’m sure you’ll make up your mind sooner or later. If nothing else you could at least try to ask her what she wants. If sane is out of the question then there’s still safe and consensual. But now I’ve got to step back dove, your mum’s back.” The difference between them was instantaneous as Will’s smile dropped off and Elsie snatched the cup to pour out the remaining tea in the sink, her movements jerky and brisk with pent up anger. “What you can do is nothing less than anything. If your princess is locked up then you go there and set her free.” “Mum, it’s not that simple. You don’t understand. This, this could be my fault.” She grimaced. “Actually, I think it’s definitely my fault. If Granya is the princess then I don’t want to be the dragon!” Her mum gave her a strange look, and then smiled. “Oh, don’t you worry about dragons, I’ll cover that part.” ... (Elsie declares war against the regime and unleashes the old magic, summoning monsters) ... The hardest part about getting to the institution wasn’t how painful it was to move, but how slow it was. Even if Jane had been able to run physically she’d constantly have to stop just to avoid the multitude of fantastical and more prominently horrifying creatures that now roamed the streets, as well as different police and military units trying to fight the monstrosities. When she finally reached the institution a group of giant, cow-tailed humanoid monsters were already there. As were the military. During the fight between two groups one of the monsters that Jane would later learn to think about as trolls crashed into the institution and its sheer mass caused the wall to crumble, leaving a gaping hole. Jane adjusted her grip on the crutch and hobbled around the square, steadily edging closer to the conflict but also the hole in the wall. Once inside it was easy to tell that the whole building was in uproar. Everyone was in a panic including the staff, most of whom seemed torn between running for the emergency exit by themselves and staying to coax the patients along. In the chaos, Jane managed to get to Granya’s room more or less unhindered. Granya was not in her room, and for a brief moment Jane despaired. Eventually she found Granya in the small stair ledge by the attic door, curled up. Jane was so grateful for the sight that she nearly cried herself as she dragged herself up the last few stairs. “Granya! Are you hurt?” Jane quickly explained the basics of what had happened as calmly as she could. ... The last scene depicts Jane, Granya, Elsie and Will living together in their new strange fairy tale like world. Elsie is still trying to help Jane and Granya with magic, but healing turned out to be more difficult than she thought and Will refuses to let her do anything at all about Granya’s problems with magic because “using magic to do anything with another person’s brain has never led to anything other than disaster for the victim”. Instead they do what they can to get the necessary meds and none of them is really educated in how to care for Granya besides but this ought to be more implied than spelled out. Category:All Pages Category:Stories Category:WIP